You also have to worry about servers that advertise that they are RP servers and then they enforce nothing. I recently left Vintage Story Civilizations because of these issues. Youtube videos fake you out and the server is 100% different. I filed a ticket because someone made it very obvious they were dm'in someone outside of game about ores on my land and I was pretty much ran off my land over it and staff told me "RP is not enforced". I may have been a hermit/cave dweller but 90% of my interactions were just people usin hotmics, talkin slang, bringing up IRL politics, etc.
It's really hard to find anything decent. I have a friend that is doing one but he's looking for testers and stuff for it though so fingers crossed his can get up and running because he wants something more RP heavy.